Jimo's cavern

Disclaimer: contains exaggerated and magnified opinions for comical effect. They do represent reality to a certain extent (based on blogger's experience) but similarities to real life people are mere coincidences! 若有雷同，纯属巧合！

1)The angmoh-pai (white-washed teenagers)


These white-washed teenagers are normally ashamed of their roots and try to emulate american high school kids by stuffing their face with chick flicks like mean girls,gossip girls and sex and the city. They start to make a mockery out of good virtues and let hell loose by adopting inappropriate behaviors.

They support the notion of melodrama in Victorian society and play up their hyper-activeness. Loud and proud, they squeak like hamsters and make a fool out of themselves. Nowadays, It's fashion and state-of-art to act dumb.

They like to pick up foreign phrases and slangs like OH-EM-GEE. And squeal YOU'RE SO MEANNNN during bitching sessions (ya right,get off your high horse bitch, I bet you feel the same way inside.)

when insulted, they resort to the bimbotic way of defending themselves. OH MY, YOU'RE SOOO ANNOYINGGGG. Yes, they like to project their high-pitched voices and love to drag their sentences.

They call their friends "the bitches". Speaking of that, they value friends over family. And they must hug their friends every single time they meet. Even though its only 5 seconds after he/she bought seaweed chicken from the canteen. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Yea, right.

They hold viral goals and seek to be rich,beautiful,dirty and famous.

They are intolerant and seek to destruct everything disagreeable that comes their way. Their favourite teasing target is Chinese-speaking people.

They are rebellious but they rebel without a good cause. Only because it's cool. Youth in revolt!

2) Overly-positive fakes


These kind of people have permanent plastic smiles plastered all over their faces but actually they have knives and daggers hidden behind them. Beware.

They claim to be ultra-friendly to you and give you the megawatt-smile and 72 tricks to win you over. They'll treat you to free food,pull your chair and etc, all kinds of resorts.

But the moral of the story is, this underlying positivity is just a mean to psyche themselves up. The loudest/happiest people are actually the ones who are the most fucked up inside.


3) The rich Aristocrats


wealthy and gorgeous people from the upper echelons of society.
Privileged people who party a hella vu time away! They try to be posh and insist to wear expensive jackets in school even when its burning 40 degree celsius.

They tend to have the latest gadgets on hand. Iphone 4. Ipad. You name it, they got it.

Their facebook profile pictures are normally pictures of them wearing sunglasses. indoors.

They like to flag for taxis instead of boarding the crowded bus.

4) The must-be-happening


Self-proclaimed social butterflies who try their best to be in-the-scene. They join cheerleading and wave their pompoms. Must join house committee, sports carnival and in the end...... their results suck kuakuakua.

5) I am very artsy-fartsy and cheemo


Must...always...use...bombastic....words...to impress!

serenade of valorous men dressed in dishabille fornicating vehemently! Of course normal people wont be able to understand except maybe for erm Shakespeare and Martians who can decode quantum numbers.... 
Need to whip out a dictionary every now and then to verify their words of wisdom!


Must speak the Shakespeare lingo to exude the attitude of a romanticist! Oh fi fai ho hum, hark here hark shall! Where forth art thou baby?


And the hokkien beng at the heartland void deck will say: simi lai eh? Mai gong jiao wei!

              the most anticipated moment of the year!

Hey hey, I'm not chosen for Temasek Internship Program(Architecture)! Haha I concede defeat lah cause I admit that I've committed some blunders and I'm not the "model student" type to represent the college lol. If not I'll tarnish their reputation and blah blah blah.

ok so, let's analyse why I didn't get shortlisted.

1) Punctuality- I submitted the form 1 day late and I was about 1min late for the interview. When I walked in everyone was staring at me. But I made sure I was on time lor! Btw I think I wasn't late, everyone else was early instead haha! The teacher-in-charge wasn't particularly happy and gave me the sarcastic smiling face. 笑里藏刀。

Note to self: Must be 15mins early next time for important official meetings.

2） Grades- I got CCDDU. Average grades I would say. Maybe It was the U that caused them to reconsider....hmmm

3) Interview- I think I did ok at the interview though. I listed all the eras of architecture from greco-roman to gothic to renaissance to barouqe and modern, post-modern, deconstructivism etc and said my fav form of architecture is Japanese Architecture because it was able to draw influences from chinese and korean architecture and built upon new styles. I love the way it projects simplicity and zen.

Different from the usual "I have a huge passion for architecture, I want to grab this opportunity to satisfy my dream" blah blah blah.

The teacher asked me where I read them from. I said the Internet and books from my Dad. She asked whether my Dad is an architect and I said yes (some aspects lah, not all). So maybe she thinks that I'm depriving others of chance cause I can get an internship at my father's company? I dunno.

4) past records- Jumping a lot of CCA, showing my inconsistency. Feedback from teachers that I'm a super inconsistent person+ slacker?

5)Traveling- I said something about travelling in the December holidays. the period of internship is from 5 Dec to 19 Dec if I remember correctly.

Aiya I think JC is scary lor, they're able to track out every little minute details and nit bits information about you, I think if they want they can even dig out the family history of your 18 lines of generation LOL.

So, if you want to have a lot of opportunities like internship/scholarship you have to be a model student and make sure you don't have anything in your disciplinary records.

Cause at the end of the day, morals and attitude>talent and performance. That's how Asian societies work for ya.

Ok, there’s this social norm/fault/problem/phenomenon in singapore and I’m here to address it today.

I think there’s this excessive fear in Singaporeans about their speech and violating the out-of-bounds markers. In turn, they toe the line set out by the govt carefully, causing them to become quite false,hypocritical and of course…the lack of sense of humour….. and also disdain in important current affairs. As the Chinese saying goes, they only sweep the snow thats right infront of their doorstep.

For example right, when policies come out in the newspaper and I will make random comments about them. When I do so, my mom almost choked on her coffee and said with a sour and bitter-gourd face: “wah you better dont say this outside hor, if PAP catch you, you will get jailed!”

Now, now. I dont think there is white terror in Singapore. And we are not living in a dystopic society like in George Orwell’s 1984 ROFL.

I think my mum’s the kind that’s apathetic about social issues. She’ll still read them but she thinks that changing things are beyond her ability and we should leave everything to the govt.

Apparently, there are a lot of miss little political-correct in school. And surprise surprise most of them are girls (not trying to be sexist). They’ll be like wonder woman, complete with the american underwear and all. They’ll strangle you with their lassos once they catch you making comments that are deemed unacceptable.

There’s this girl in my class who is extreme pc, I cannot tahan. Once a upon a time, she kept eating at the muslim stall in school and I jokingly said “wah you became muslim isit”. Then her face suddenly turn black like charcoal and said “tsk ,nothing wrong with being muslim what! show some respect please.”

Btw, I dont think that my comments are insulting and condescending in anyway. It’s like saying “wah since when did you become angmoh” when you keep patronising the western stall or “wah you became japanese isit”.

And then in class right, sometimes we will touch upon religious issues because we have to do so for the sake of General Paper. Comparatively speaking, some religious teachings do have loopholes and seem to have wreaked havoc.

I mean the creationism theory is stupid (although I think alot people would beg to differ), and how many people have been killed in the crusade conquest huh and clergymen were partly responsible for the social mess during the 100years of Chinese Ignominy.

Then if you state some comments in class people will just stare at you and think that you are some looney person released from the IMH. We are not supposed to make any comments that tear the social fabric of Singapore, remember?

If you make any comments, albeit constructive ones, people will just frown and think that you’re disrespectful. I mean for the sake and progess of mankind, I think that its ok to give constructive criticisms about religion that’s based on facts and not based on irrational ideology.

And earlier this year my ex-gp teacher was talking about a girl that is autistic( I dont think she is lah,she is just extremely extroverted) in another class and I said “but I thought autistic people cant come to TJ?”

Then immediately I got slammed by another girl (not the one on top) “why cant come to TJ?’ and she rolled her eyes.

She’s thinking that I’m elitist sia but I did not mean it that way. Btw, I think that I’m kinda humble LOL. I mean, autistic people have to go to special schools right because they have special needs that need to be catered to. Their learning ability is different from us what. so ya.

And then there’s this pc girl in my cca who gets on my nerves alot and I think she’s like the spokesperson sent by the government or something. She will find every opportunity to shoot me down about my comments.

There’s this day when my friends and I were talking about something in a jokingly manner then she said something like “can you not stereotype please?” and things like “can you please respect people?”

and guess what, the next minute of so she was talking about how guys cannot do this, guys should behave in blah blah blah manner and gays are disgusting. seems kinda contradictory to me. I think because being gay is considered to be “immoral and illegal” in the eyes of the govt, that’s why people use them as an object to vent their frustrations.

haix I’m living in a mad mad world. Sometimes I ponder what’s the use of literature when criticisms laid out 100 years ago have not changed to social problem. Lu Xun must be turning in his grave now because the kind of social fault(apathetic people that follow standardised opinions like sheep without thinking them through) that are in his stories are still prevalent in society.

Oh shit, you know what I think I just missed my Econs Lecture while typing this hahaha.

I’m admitted to Temasek Junior college wtf. Try logging in with your IC number as pw and username at the TJC matrix login.

My name is in the students database haha!

http://www.tjc.edu.sg

when I logged in, I got greeted by this big big font. ” WELCOME TO maTrix, MR XXXXXXXXXX”

loophole exploited. heh heh.

Oh if you’re from other JCs, try accessing your own JC’s website.

Damn cool to know results before the rest of the world yo.

Jumps around*

I’m in a dilemma now.

I want to go TJC, it’s sort of a dream school. I remembered when TJ principal visited my school, Justin said that it was almost impossible to enter TJ and woah, I sort of fulfill the criteria for arts stream now.

I visited TJ open house with joan and Seryang brought me around. The environment is very vibrant, the students are very enthusiastic and the culture is neighbourhood-friendly, kinda like xinmin.(Maybe they put up front cause of open house, if I go in maybe they will step on my shadow wtf.)

The only thing is that the trip from my house to TJ is about 1 hr+++++.

My Elitist/tyrannical/conceited sister is advising me against going to TJ because of the light year distance and she speculates that I can’t wake up in time for school just like the old marist days when I skipped school like nobuddy’s business.

During half days like CNY celebration, national Day celebration you sure cant see me one wtf.

Anderson JC, in comparison is much nearer. Direct bus. 20-25mins trip. The culture is also very neighbourhood-friendly, the people are very nice and all but…the building is so old and raggy. What if it decides to collapse one day and bury poor me alive wtf.

The campus looks like some factory and the uniform looks like some factory worker’s. Great combination woots.

Fengshui masters said that one’s environment can affect one’s inner peace/harmony. The school looks so…..dead.

sajc/acjc/cjc is out of the question cause…. they’re only good if u’re angmoh/half angmoh/rich/gorgeous/elitist.if u’re a normal person u’d be cast out.it’s a total hierarchy there.

But that’s my own narrow perspective as an outsider lah, I have no experience in that school so I’m not in a position to judge. I just want to be careful and make sure that I make a wise choice and have an enriching and fulfilling college life.

Ok, I have to hand up my choices in 24 hour’s time. I might have trouble filling up ALL TWELVE choices. Why give so many sia.

I did a tip tap dance when I received my o levels results. my L1R5 is one-third of my prelim results wtf, I got 28 for prelims. I don’t know what I was doing back then. Miracles do happen in this world after all.

Luckily I did okay or my mum will use broomstick to chase me out of the house and my Elitist sister will break all ties with me.

After prelim 2, I studied everyday for a month and completed all the tys. All my tys got tear stains wtf cause I was under huge pressure. My plan was to study six hours everyday, play neopets three hours, the rest for eat/sleep/shit. O levels is like pressure cooker, it’s either you become a hyper competitive prick or develop inferiority complex. Which one is worse, go figure out yourself.

I got A1 for English,Chinese and physic/chemistry. A2 for e math and humanities, b3 for a maths and D7 for biology haha.

This is seriously dumb cause I channeled most of my energy into a maths and it became the worst subject of my L1R5. English and Chinese didn’t really touch except for writing essays.

My strategy was to heck care biology totally because I’m not a fan of blood. And my biology teacher is really very demoralising, he made me feel stupid.

There’s still this stupid feeling that I could have done better. Sigh, me so self-deprecating. I was under huge pressure during o levels. Cried a bit after a maths paper two cause blardy difficult. Left one 8 mark question blank for geog cause not enough time. And my heart got poached away three days before o levels. Stupid me, could’ve had better tolerance.

Hehezx, i went to work at raffles hotel straight away after results got released. Luckily, I did okay if not I spill drinks on customer, spit on manager wtf.

Hope everyone around me did well too. Quite sad that some of my friends did badly. I could do nothing except for consoling them. What the future does not end here, still can work hard wtf. But yea my words also not golden, cant help much.

Sigh, finally can sleep peacefully tonight after being haunted for so long. Sweet Sweet dreams like cotton candy.

But now I’m in a dilemma whether to go poly and take mass com or go reputable jc(s) like tjc,ajc,sajc??? I swear poly and jc is like macdonalds and KFC, rivals of the century.

Photographed by Josie Png@ The Botanic Gardens.

I wore green to blend in with the surroundings.

My mind has been like a juice blender, shredding all the negative thoughts into pieces with its sharp razor. I felt like I have been weaving miracles with the help of god’s thread.

Things that were ailing are healing slowly. After stepping into the society, my perspectives have broadened as well. I feel so fortunate when compared to students who have to juggle work and school.
Although my father doesn’t have a rubber plantation for me to inherit, at least he put bread and butter on the table.

I have survived so many pit holes and slaughterhouses. Fall in the pit, gain in the wit. Authoritarian headmasters and domineering seniors do not matter anymore. They have become oblivious as they faded into the background. Those rumours that spread like wildfire have already burned hectares of forest. I’m glad those who wanted me under their foot like a cockroach did not succeed.

I’m glad I didn’t throw in the towel as I struggled in the quicksand. I have conquered the o’s. I almost retained in sec 3 and how I turned the tables is really miraculous. Thanks Bodhisattva with a thousand arms for blessing me with the ability of being able to absorb information like a sponge.

For those who didn’t do well, your journey does not end here. There is still light at the end of the tunnel, your future will be so bright that you’ll be blinded. You’ll just have to widen your eye, let the light pass through your cornea and fall on your fovea centralis. When we go to JC/Poly or even I.T.E, we’ll be at the same starting line again. How you fare, its up to you. There’s still many opportunities available. You just have to search every nook and cranny.

We’re still so young, the road is still long ahead in front of us. For those who did well, do not be complacent. For those who didn’t, hold your head up high.

2009 is going to be a great year. Even though our purse strings may tighten because of the economy being covered in snot, after America decided to sneeze. Polar ice caps will melt as global warming continues, but 2009 is still going to be a great year. I’m sure it will be.

End of the world is drawing near! Millions of meteorites will crash onto Earth, afflicting many potholes. Streaks of lightning (10,000 voltage) will clatter down from the swirling clouds and show no mercy to trees that stand in their path.

The waves will rise out of water, first like shark fins then increase indefinitely in size until they become as tall as Eiffel tower. Every skyscraper erected on Singapore’s surface will be toppled over and Singapore will be submerged underwater completely. History has repeated itself. Singapore will be the next Atlantis.

Okay, tomorrow is o levels results release date. Confirm, guarantee plus chop. As I am writing this, my heart is plummeting and slithering down a few notches until where my stomach is located. Tomorrow, the dogs who guard the hell gates will be released and they will bite those who have failed terribly. I wonder if I will be banished to the valley of gloom.

I felt that I didn’t work hard enough but whatever it is, I am ready to receive the verdict like a pig is for a slaughterhouse.

My father doesn’t have a massive rubber plantation for me to inherit, neither does he have a multi-million company for me to run. Education is my only ticket to the future you know. Why am I always building castles in the sky, sigh. Ho hum. Wish me luck. May the force be with me.

O level students, if you are reading this, may the force be with you too. At most die together wtf, won’t be lonely like that.

I have an MCQ paper tomorrow and i’m still up zzz

i hope I dont fall asleep tml. If I do, i hope some kind soul will wake me up.

zzz. bye.

My mum had hidden the com again, ha! I’ve searched every nook and cranny, highs and lows but to no avail. T_T I’m basically deprived of a man’s basic needs now. huhuhu. But it’s for my own good cause I always subcummb to computer gratification wtf.

The com has always played a pivotal role in my demise, but I’m a willing party! My life supporting system, sigh.

At com lab now arh, Higher chinese lessons rock my socks!

Anyway, A maths {Area under a region} can suck my ass wtf. Seriously, I always have problems visualising things, but they say men are supposed to be visual animals, sigh. I see everyone doing the test like easy breezy Japanesey, I think I’ll end up with 14/25 T_T. Kinematics saved my big, fat ass :D:D:D:D

People always say that I have the highest T-score in the class, supposed to live up to my name yadda yadda but seriously, I think my studying engine has like rusted. I need to keep it roaring again somehow.

Oh, my glorious past. Seriously, I dont know why we have to go to such an extent to validate our abilities/capabilities. I wished that I was born in the 1960’s when life isn’t so competitive. I must have crossed the reincarnation bridge at the wrongest time, oh mother!

But then again, I should count my blessings. If I’m born in africa, I’ll be stricken with poverty! I’ll suffer from malnutrition and get aids from my mother or something. Being born in a china farm also very kelian if you’re a girl, you’ll be dumped into the shitbowl!!! Nooooo!

Oh wait, I’m studying in a catholic school for goodness sake. I should believe in afterlife!!! Everlasting life!!!! If I don’t commit any sins, that is.

49 days left to prelim 2.
Which means an average of 7 days for one subject. I’m feeling the stress already, sending a rippling sensation down my spine and forming goosebumps all over my body. (primary sch compo ehehehe.)